Sometimes, Kagome would wake up in the middle of the night, and realize that InuYasha’s warm body was not next to hers. Looking up, she would find the room lit dimly with a small fire in the fire pit for light, and InuYasha sitting against the wall, sometimes with his sword leaning on his shoulder, as if he were keeping watch over her and their son. His eyes would stare into the fire, haunted as if he were seeing things that only he could see, and she knew he had woken up from yet another nightmare.
She would go to him then, sometimes, and pull him close, and let him wrap his arms around her until she could feel the tension leave his body. At times, in these moments, his mouth sought hers hungrily, as if reassuring himself of her wholeness and the reality of her being in his arms.
Six months had passed since the bandit attack where he found her battered and bruised. Winter had come and gone, and slowly, the nightmares and wariness for her safety and health had begun to fade, and it had been over a month since she had found him sitting up, but during the day, some soldiers heading west had passed through the village, and one of them looked a lot like one of the bandits.
Kagome sat up in bed and sighed, not surprised to see her husband sitting against the wall. When he had seen the travelers walking down the main path through the village, he had frozen for the moment, and she had felt his youki flare. She had looked up, moving her eyes from the basket of supplies she was holding. Kaede had been treating one of the village boys for a wounded hand. InuYasha’s amber eyes had hardened, and he clenched his fists, staring at the two men walking past the hut.
Kaede, pursing her lips, had looked up from the bandage she had been wrapping around the boy’s hand. “What ails you, InuYasha?” she had asked, deftly tying a knot to secure the wrapping then ruffing the boy’s head as she said “There you go, child. Next time, take more care when using your father’s knife.”
The boy had taken one look at InuYasha, and had run off. InuYasha had shaken his head, but said nothing, although Kagome, taking a look at the travelers had immediately known what the problem was. Her breath had quickened at the sight. The elder of the two men had borne an uncanny resemblance to Toshiro, except for a jagged scar across his face. As the travelers had walked by, the younger man had started to make a comment to InuYasha who was watching them closely, but before he could say anything, Toshiro’s lookalike had pulled him away, and they had continued their walk on the road out of town.
Collecting her son from Rin, Kagome had given Atae to InuYasha and had led the two back home, but the damage had been done, and all afternoon, her husband had been on edge. And now, in the middle of the night, he stared into the dimness, unable to rest.
She got out of bed, and began walking towards him. The fire, although small, still managed to touch his silver hair with red highlights. Although he didn’t say anything, he watched her as she moved across the room, his scowl softening into something sad and needy. Sitting down, she leaned her head against his shoulder.
“I’m sorry,” he said, softly. He uncrossed his arms and draped one around her. “I didn’t mean to wake you up.” His cheek nuzzled the top of her head.
She rested her hand lightly on the top of his thigh. “It’s okay. Couldn’t sleep?”
“Couldn’t stop thinking,” he said. “Lots of what ifs.”
She turned in his hold so she could look at his face. “What ifs can be evil things sometimes,” she said. “But what if I heat the water in the bathtub for you and see if that helps?”
He shook his head. She ran her hand along the soft linen of his kosode and looked up into his eyes. “What if I promise never to do something you think is unsafe again?”
“Feh,” he said with a snort. “Don’t promise me impossible things.” A ghost of a smile touched his lips.
“So you think that’s impossible, huh?” she said, raising herself up on her knees.
He turned towards her, and looked up into her eyes. “Oh, I know it is. Someone’ll need something and off you’ll go to do the helpful thing.” He wrapped both arms around her waist. “Or you’ll do something without thinking how it could be dangerous.” He rested his head against her bosom. “Or something will happen when I’m not around.” His arms tightened slightly around her.
Sighing as she ran her hands through his hair, she leaned forward and kissed the tip of one of his ears, watching as it flicked from the contact. There was pain in his voice and she felt guilty for it.
“What if I promise to try?”
“That’s a start,” he said, pulling away, yawning. “What if I remind you of that in the morning?”
“Sounds like a plan,” Kagome said, and standing up, she led her husband back to their bed.