My niece will be having a baby on Thursday. My grandmother has something wrong where she, sick and old, can barely walk and isn't supposed to any more than absolutely necessary, but refuses to not live alone, my oldest stepson got himself into serious legal trouble involving drugs, and my step mom had to have some skin cancers removed (I think. Sometimes, my niece gets confused on these issues). I am far away from everybody in trouble. It feels weird, like I ought to be there in the middle of things, and I can't. I found out everything except the imminent arrival of my grandnephew today.
Blessing, I think. Especially for my son who I might be tempted to strangle. ( Although, from what his brother told me he had been doing, he probably looks like such a burnout that it'd kick my nurturing side into gear. He's been playing games with Dame Horse, they tell me, and that's a really bad thing.)
Blue eyed golden boy
chasing after power's ghost,
turning away though
when you felt its solidness,
preferring the dark shadows.
Why did the sunlight
seem so blinding when given
that you chose to run
each time you touched the brass ring,
each time you could have been real?